Advertising gone wild.

The other day in class, I booted up my computer. All of a sudden, really loud, came the Windows jingle that plays at startup. Damn Microsoft (again). Normally, I am meticulous about turning off the sound after listening to music so that this doesn’t happen. I must have slipped. This got me thinking. What kind of a product plays the company jingle every time one uses it? If this happened normally:

• Each time you opened a box of Lucky Charms, a leprechaun would leap out and shout, “They’re magically delicious!” With frosted flakes, you hear, “They’re gggrrreeaaatttt!” Eating Wheaties and you’re reassured that you’re eating, “The breakfast of champions.”

• Whenever you turned on your Chevy truck, you’d hear Bob Seger sing, “Like a rock.”

• When you tore open a package of baloney, you’d hear, “My baloney has a first name – O-S-C-A-R. My baloney has a second name. It’s M-A-Y-E-R.”

• Every time you shut your car door, you’d hear your insurance company’s (complete hooey) tag line – “You’re in good hands.” (Allstate); “Like a good neighbor.” (State Farm); “Have you met life today?” (Metropolitan); “Farmers gets you back to where you belong.” (Farmers); “Amica, we keep our promises to you.” (Amica).

• You’re about to leave home, forgetting your wallet, and your American Express card plays a loud, “Don’t leave home without it!”

• You’re hung-over and open the medicine cabinet to hear, “Plop, Plop, Fizz, Fizz, Oh! What a relief it is!”

Worse than this would be hearing competitor jingles:

• Your generic trash bag fails and you hear, “Don’t get mad, get GLAD.”

• You crash your car and when your airbags deploy you hear, “You could have saved fifteen percent or more in 15 minutes with Progressive.”

• You’re googling drug treatment facilities for your wayward teen and hear, “The few, the proud, the marines” or “Be all you can be.”

• You open your fridge to cook dinner for your family and you hear, “You deserve a break today.”

I sincerely hope that this blog post doesn’t give some crazy advertising executive any ideas. Because as the Microsoft example (and the fact that we sit through advertising after paying nearly $10 for a movie ticket) clearly shows, we are willing to pay for them to advertise to us. Ugh.